


Great Party

by stardustandswimmingpools



Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: (jared), Alcohol, Author Takes the Canon and Shoves it In a Dumpster, Drinking, F/M, Gay Male Character, Partying, Pre-Relationship, Social Anxiety, Underage Drinking, Vague mentions of sex, also Not Drinking, dont read if your boss is like RIGHT behind you, drunk jared kleinman is basically jared kleinman, ish, it's jared, it's sfw tho trust me, not evan tho evan is Bi as Hell, the alcohol is....drinkable..., trust me it will be when I'M through with it, update: still not a tag, well like 99 percent sfw, you know what im saying, zoe murphy is my wife and i love her
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-25
Updated: 2017-03-25
Packaged: 2018-10-10 04:37:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,510
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10429245
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stardustandswimmingpools/pseuds/stardustandswimmingpools
Summary: This party is: loud, smelly, boring, anxiety-inducing, potentially life-threatening, definitely Panic Attack Central, and entirely Jared’s fault.Okay, thepartyisn’t Jared’s fault. But it’s one hundred percent on him for dragging Evan here.“If you don’t get out more, I’m gonna just assume you’re a vampire,”he’d said.“I’m always outside!”Evan had argued.“Yeah, in the trees,”Jared had said.“You’re not a squirrel, Evan. For fuck’s sake, just come to the party with me.”





	

**Author's Note:**

> I found a great prompt on Tumblr: _"“My friend dragged me to a party and then abandoned me but you came up to me and we started talking and somehow I started talking about how I didn’t want to be here while you start smirking when my friend comes back and introduces you to me as the host of the party and I blush really hard because I’ve been ranting about how boring it was for 10 minutes” AU"_  
>  anyhow, i'm in Dear Evan Hansen-fic-writing mode right now, so have this lil mediocrity and enjoy at your own risk lol  
> please forgive my SHITTY title, everyone knows i suck at titling stuff, okay, let me LIVE

This party is: loud, smelly, boring, anxiety-inducing, potentially life-threatening, definitely Panic Attack Central, and entirely Jared’s fault.

Okay, the _party_ isn’t Jared’s fault. But it’s one hundred percent on him for dragging Evan here.

 _“If you don’t get out more, I’m gonna just assume you’re a vampire,”_ he’d said.

 _“I’m always outside!”_ Evan had argued.

 _“Yeah, in the_ trees _,”_ Jared had said. _“You’re not a squirrel, Evan. For fuck’s sake, just come to the party with me.”_

Evan had run out of reasons to say no that didn’t involve his own personal affliction (read: severe anxiety) and Jared didn’t seem to care a lot about that, and so here they were.

Well. Here _he_ was. Jared…

“Alright, here’s the rundown: drinks are on that table. If you want to dance you need to find someone to dance with first, dancing by yourself is lame and pathetic. If you hole yourself up in a room, you will almost definitely be interrupted by two people of any potential gender stumbling in blackout drunk having sex, capische? Awesome, have fun! I’m going to grab a drink, a guy, and another drink.”

And then Jared had dematerialized into the throngs of people and now Evan is stuck awkwardly shifting on his feet by the door, feeling so out-of-place he may as well be in a different universe.

“Thanks, Jared,” he mumbles. Holing himself up in a room _had_ been his plan, but now it sounds more like a nightmare, so he shoves his hands in his pockets, squeezes his eyes shut, and tries not to think about how miserable it is in this house.

Eventually he figures he should probably step away from the door in case it opens, so he reluctantly wanders into what was probably once a living room, clinging to the outer edges of the room and hugging the wall as he people-watches and regrets his life choices. He closes his eyes but the music just feels amplified somehow.

“Hey,” someone says loudly in his ear, and Evan’s eyes fly open as he trips backwards and catches himself on the wall.

“Oh,” Evan says, equal parts relieved and unsettled at having been acknowledged, “um, hello.” There’s a girl standing in front of him — no, wait, his vision’s clearing, and that’s definitely Zoe Murphy. He's drastically torn between saying more and shutting up completely, and he feels like he's standing there for ten years just gaping at her.

There's a sort of half-smile to her face, clear enough that he knows she's sober.

“Having a good time?” she asks him.

Evan huffs out a deep breath of disgust, and opts for honesty, for once. “ _No_ ,” he tells Zoe, and suddenly complaints spill from his mouth. “It's so loud I can't hear myself think, which is usually good because God I hate thinking but it’s not even the good kind of not-thinking, it’s like I’m only not-thinking because I’m thinking about how loud it is here, and it’s driving me crazy. And also it smells _terrible_ , and all of this alcohol — which, by the way, is so illegal, and that makes me nervous, I mean, how do high schoolers do so many illegal things? If I broke the law even once I’d probably die,” and then he punctuates that comment with a hollow, awkward chuckle, because, alright, that’s not something you say in normal conversation, or _any_ conversation.

Zoe’s head is tilting slightly to the side, looking a bit like a confused dog, but there’s a mischievous twinkle to her eyes and her smile is getting bigger. “Go on.”

Evan blinks. “I’m crowded and there are too many people. This is so unhealthy. This — do people just — I mean, what’s the whole point of, like, of a party at all? Who even knows this many people? Why would anyone willingly have, like, a hundred drunk idiots at their house? It’s just, it’s dumb, and parties are stupid, not to, uh, rain on your parade or anything, since you were probably having a good time before I — by the way, my name is Evan.” Very smooth, like.

Zoe chuckles. “I know. I’m Zoe.”

“Zoe,” Evan repeats, and then shakes his head out. “This party is messing me up, I’m so sorry, I — you’re Zoe, great, that’s really cool, great name. I mean not like abnormally great, you know. Like a normal level of great.”

“I’m glad you think so.”

“Maybe I’m just neurotic, like maybe I’m just _totally insane,_ I mean, none of this is good for, like, my anxiety, which, no big deal, but I just — there are a lot of people here. Lots of impressions to make. Anyway, are you having a good time? I didn’t mean to wreck your party experience, you’re a normal high schooler, you’re probably having a blast.”

Zoe actually laughs then, fully laughs out loud, and even Evan can hear it over the music. It’s a delightful sound.

“I’m — I’m having an awesome time _now_ , yeah,” Zoe tells him, grinning.

And then, blessed be he, Jared finally meanders over to Evan. He throws an arm over Evan’s shoulder and practically shouts in his ear, “Evan! M’ boy!”

Oh, wait, _he’s_ the blackout drunk. Evan hates when Jared gets drunk because then he has to drive and he hates driving, especially at night, because sometimes he forgets to put on his turn signal and then cars all honk at him and he freaks out thinking he’s gonna get into an accident, or sometimes he’s _too_ intent on putting his turn signal on and he forgets to watch the light so he’s sitting there in front of a green light for a minute before he hears all of the honking and angry cars behind him and then he wishes he could melt.

“Jared,” Evan says tiredly. And then, with an apologetic look to Zoe, “Zoe, this is Jared, the reason I’m here in the first place.”

Jared laughs obnoxiously loud and says, “Zoe! Good to — hiya, Zoe. Zoe, this is Evan Hansen —” which is punctuated with a giggle, “Evan, my young padawan, this is Zoe —”

“I know —” Evan begins.

“She’s the host, so you can thank her for all the magic that’s happening here t’night,” Jared continues. “Our savior. Our queen. God, eloheinu melech ha-olam, bless you.” And then Jared claps his palms together and bows to Zoe as Evan thinks about the fastest way to book it.

He swallows a lump in his throat roughly the size of a state. “The — the host? Like, as in, the host of the party? Like this is your party? That you arranged?”

Zoe is smirking now. “It sure is.”

Evan can feel the blush creeping up his neck into his cheeks like poison spreading through him, and he manages, “Oh.” And then, after a pause, through what feels like a mouthful of sand, he mumbles, “Great party.”

Zoe laughs again. “Too late.”

“Evan…” Jared says. “What’d you do? I can’t take you anywhere, honestly.”

“I didn’t — nice to talk to you, Zoe, I gotta go right now,” Evan says, yanking Jared away and half-waving at Zoe as he gets away from her, from that exchange, from Evan making a total ass out of himself at, yes, _her party._

He doesn’t even bother checking the room he’s about to enter before entering, just throws Jared in and slams the door. It would be just his luck to have it occupied, but thank god, it’s empty and dark. He throws the light switch and slides down the back of the door, head in hands.

“Uh, Evan, not to make this weird, but you did just throw me into an empty room at a party while I’m, like, at least twenty percent drunk. Are we having sex?”

Evan almost chokes. “ _Jared!_ ”

“I’m just _asking_ ,” Jared defends, holding his hands up when Evan glares at him. “I can’t possibly think of a reason you would run from Zoe Murphy and into an empty bedroom with me except that you want to sleep with me. Which, by the way, I’m opposed to, but then again, I’m at least forty percent drunk, and I’m sure you could —”

“ _JARED_.”

“Alright, okay.” Jared surrenders, sitting instead on the edge of the bed. “You should lock the door if you don’t want unwelcome visitors who are gonna try to use this room for its intended use. Not sleeping. Sex.”

“I get it,” Evan snaps.

“Jeez, what’s got your virgin panties in a twist?” Jared says, and Evan rolls his eyes.

“I just complained to Zoe Murphy about how awful this party is for at least ten minutes,” Evan groans. “ _H_ _er_ party, which I definitely didn’t know while I was complaining about it. Oh, god, she’s going to hate me forever, isn’t she?”

“Probably,” Jared says sympathetically.

Evan moans and buries his face in his hands. “I’m such an idiot.”

“Yup.”

“Why did I let you bring me here? This could have been avoided,” Evan points out, through the cracks between the heels of his hands that are pressed against his chin.

“Nah, I’m sure you would’ve found a way to fuck it up anyway,” Jared says.

“You’re really not being helpful at all.”

“I’m drunk,” Jared says.

“That’s not your get-out-of-jail-free card, you know,” Evan says. “You’re actually much more likely to end up _in_ jail.”

“Not if you never let me out of this _room_ ,” Jared says.

Evan groans. “Can we leave?”

“No! We’re just getting to the good part,” Jared tells him, enthusiastically jumping to his feet and holding a hand out. “Come on, man, get up. Let’s go find some hot people and then we can come back here and —”

“Whatever you’re proposing, stop,” Evan interrupts, and Jared huffs.

“I’m just saying, let loose, bro!” Jared pries Evan’s hand off his face and yanks on his arm until Evan surrenders, wincing, and clambers to his feet. “ _Thank_ you! Now, are you gonna sit in here like a wuss and wait until the only person left here is Zoe and then have that awkward conversation as you attempt to leave —”

“I’d actually like to leave right now.”

“Or are you gonna go out there like a _man_ and face the music?” Jared demands.

“We could leave,” Evan suggests hopefully.

Jared rolls his eyes. “Get over yourself, Evan. Go have fun.”

Evan laughs mirthlessly. “Fun, yeah. Do you know how bad this party is for, like, me in general?”

“Probably terrible,” Jared agrees. “Can’t imagine your anxiety is thriving, but your wild side will flourish!”

And with that, he flings open the door and the music fills the room, and Evan groans audibly before flicking the lights off and following closely behind Jared.

Two people shove past him, tangled up in each other, and Evan jumps away from them and brushes off his shoulder vigorously until he gets the grimy feeling of _ugh_ off of him. They only touched his t-shirt, but still. Gross.

“Evan!”

 _Nope._ Evan’s eyes widen as Zoe starts towards him, but he freezes to the spot for some reason until she’s just in front of him. There’s a smile playing on her lips, and her eyes crinkle so he knows it’s not a mocking smile.

“Evan, hey, I didn’t mean to make you feel bad,” Zoe says apologetically. “Look, you don’t have to like parties. I get it, they’re loud, they’re crazy.”

“I am,” Evan says, “so sorry. That was so incredibly rude of me to just ramble on and on to you like — just bashing this — _wonderful_ party, I don’t, it’s really a — a great party, and the...alcohol is...drinkable…” He trails off and closes his eyes, and exhales.

Zoe laughs. “Evan, you don’t have to pretend like you’re having a good time if you’re not. And hey, it sucks to be dragged places you don’t want to go. If you want to go home, I won’t be offended. I’d offer to walk you home or something, but, you know.” She gestures around the room and then to herself. Evan forces a chuckle.

“I have to wait for Jared to be done hitting on unsuspecting guys and drowning himself in alcoholic drinks,” he says, trying to keep the misery, the bitterness, from his tone. “And then I have to drive him home because otherwise he’s going to kill himself and fifty other people.”

Zoe looks sympathetic. She pats his shoulder. “Well, look, if you want, you can go up to my room and just hang out in there. There’s a _do not enter_ sign on the door so I doubt anyone’s in there, and if there is I can kick them out. I’d hate for you to get all anxious because of me, or Jared, or whoever’s fault it is that you’re here.”

Evan’s too lost in the fact that her hand was actually touching his shoulder for a minute there, and it takes him a moment to process the words she’s saying. “Oh — no, no, I couldn’t. That — that’s nice of you, but —”

“Seriously,” Zoe cuts him off, “it’s fine. I don’t — I have, like, books and stuff. Come on.”

She grabs his wrist and Evan lets himself be pulled along, dragged up the stairs (where Jared, who’s leaning against a wall chatting up some tall dude, mouths _nice_ and winks obviously, and Evan almost chokes again) and then ushered into the bedroom with a bright red _do not enter_ sign on the door.

“Honestly, that sign is usually for Connor,” Zoe says as she closes the door behind them, and Evan surveys Zoe’s room and marvels at the fact that he’s actually _in Zoe Murphy’s room_. “I totally forgot it was on there, but oh well. I have no clue where Connor even is tonight.”

“You have a good room,” Evan comments. He slaps a palm against his forehead. “Was that weird? I’m sorry, that was probably super weird, we don’t really know each other.”

“I don’t think it was weird,” Zoe says. “I agree, my room is awesome. Here, you can sit on my bed or — I don’t care, make yourself comfortable. I’ll tell Jared to come find you when he’s ready to leave, okay?”

Evan’s breath suddenly feels like it’s scraping the sides of his throat as he inhales, but not in a bad way, just...it’s a weird feeling, being taken care of, having someone do things so you’re not uncomfortable. Evan’s not used to it.

“Um,” he manages, “thanks, Zoe.”

And Zoe gives him a bright, earnest smile, and says, “Anytime. I’m sorry you’re having such a shitty time, but I hope it’s not a shitty memory, you know?” As her hand grasps the doorknob, she turns around again, and says, “I’ll be back in like ten minutes and we can hang out, if you want. I just have to socialize a bit. Cool?”

“Cool,” Evan finds himself echoing.

She slips out the door and Evan gazes after her, even after it’s closed.

Zoe Murphy is pretty much an angel. And _that’s_ not a shitty memory.

**Author's Note:**

> thank! you! for! reading! i'm on tumblr @vivilevone or @do-you-ever-really-crash so hit me up!


End file.
